You’ve Got Some ‘Splainin To Do…

In the words of R. Kelly, there is something I must connnnnnnnnfeeeeeeesssssss… I don’t see nothing wrong with a little bump and grind.

   

Ok, so that’s R. Kelly’s confession. I jacked it. What’s it to ya? I’m ok with a little bump and grind too. 

For realz, though. Here are a few things I need to get off my chest… 

1. I got up at 1:07 yesterday morning and made me a peanut butter-blueberry-cream-cheese-low-carb-tortilla-wrap. Ate it and went back to bed. 
2. I’m not pregnant. 
3. I know this for a 100% fact because Aunt Flo is visiting this week and she’s been telling me to do bad things. 
4. I had something VERRRRRAH inappropriate sent to myself at work. Let’s just call it “note cards”. 
5. I might have had a slight panic attack while out at lunch yesterday worrying about “WHAT IF…what if IT came and Jill, the receptionist, decided to be nosey?” “WHAT IF, one of the drafting guys thought it was for them??” How WOULD I explain myself. Then, I came up with the perfect solution. I bought it for Skillz. Fortunately, I didn’t have to lie. We all know where you go for that shiz. 
6. I’ve been trying to curtail my potty mouth and any time I try to attempt that I come up with a new catch phrase/fake cuss word/phrase. This weeks’ faux bad word is “MUTHER LOVIN’” Try it out. It feels good rolling off the tongue. Mix that in with a little “sofa king” and “shiz” and I got most of the cuss word groups covered. 
7. Here’s a fun little game: Any time you feel like letting one fly (cuss word that is), think of a name of someone in the Bible, NOT God or Jesus because that’s blasphemous and we don’t use the Lord’s name in vain…but like Noah or Moses or if you really know your stuff, you could pull out one of those old testament guys that not many people know about, like Haggai…and you put their name with an object that starts with the same letter. Example: “Noah on the Nile!” or “Moses in the Mohave!”…and for bonus points use a name like Haggai…”Haggai in a hammock!”…”Jezebel in a jalopy!” 

 It’s fun. I swear. 

Well, hope everyone has had a supah fab week.

Friday Confessions

On Wednesday, I was visiting Andrea's blog - My Chihuahua Bites, 

and she was discussing 

Why Romance Novels & The Notebook Have Ruined My Life.  

(That's a live link, if you want to click on it and read.)   

She said that she had unrealistic ideas about what her first kiss was supposed to be like...unrealistic ideas about what love was supposed to be like.  Her first kiss was not what "romance novels are made of"  She said that in fact it was, and I quote, "gross".  Andrea considers her first REAL First Kiss to be with her first true love, at night, in the church parking lot.  

You're probably wondering where the confession part comes in.  

Well, I'm about to tell you.

After reading Andrea's posts, it got me to thinking about my first kiss...es.  It kind of took me back and I reminisced for a moment.  I thought to myself,

 "yeah, I remember kissing so-and-so in the church parking lot...

oh, and then there was so-and-so on the church van...

OH yeah, and so-and-so in the church baptistery." 

Holy geez.  What was I thinking?

So, confession #1 is...

I have spent a large amount of my life at church...and I kissed a lot of boys while I was there.

Confession #2 is...

Michael came up to me last week and said "somebody is turning the big double 3eeeeee soon."  I told him that I would not know who that would be, because I am going to be 32.  He just laughed.  He thought I was joking.  I was not.  I was totally serious.  Somewhere, somehow, I lost a whole flippin' year.  Where did 32 go?  I could have sworn I was only 31.  Dang it.

Confession #3...

I think birthdays are definitely something to be celebrated. 

*said in my best Edward Cullen impersonation*

(skip to 0:23 and ignore the German footnotes...concentrate on the vampire)

I'm just not an over-celebrator.  

My husband on the other-hand is in this category.  

He thinks his birthday should be celebrated ALL week.  

It's Michaelpalooza!!!!  

Everybody party!!!!

WOOHOO!!!

I'm just a girl who appreciates one more year 

and a few nice gifts or cards or money is nice 

(money is so nice)...

or Gold Tickets to the Dallas Twilight Convention...

achem...

just an example, 

but I'm not an over-celebrator.

Babe, if you're reading this, 

know that I love you...

and your birthday week!  

Happy Michaelpalooza!

Are you an over-celebrator?

What was your first kiss like?

Gross?

Magical?

Hope you all have a fabulous Friday♥

*muah* ;)

Black Friday Confessions

So, here it is...once again it is BLACK FRIDAY!!! I'm so flippin' excited. I have a few confessions regarding Black Friday. I'm sure a few of you will nod your head in agreement, while others will for sure be thinking I'm crazy. Regardless, here they are:

• We've mapped out our stores. Seriously. My mom and I literally have a map of where we want to go, when we want to be there (according to what time they open), and how long we can spend there.


• We have a list of each item we want to buy at each store.


• I have coupons and I'm not afraid to use them. It just occurred to me that I can use a coupon with a Door Buster Deal...I'm all over that!


• We will hit Starbucks at least 3 times before the day is over.


• We have our own shopping basket. It can fold flat...like the ones people take to craft fairs. We take it to haul all of our goods around the mall. Wal-Mart and Target have baskets, but not the mall! Have you ever tried to carry 20 bags around a mall for 10 hours? Your hand will go numb and you will start to feel like you might lose a limb. It's brutal.


• Sometimes we take a shopping break and see a Holiday movie. If my mom and aunt decide to catch a Holiday movie at the theater, I will probably bail and catch one more viewing of New Moon...a date with Edward and Jacob is just simply irresistible.


• My uncle is our chauffeur. If you haven't tried it, you should. He drives us to the door and we call him when we're ready to leave...and he drives back up to the door to retrieve us and our bags. All he requires is food! It's fantastic!


• We've been known to call my dad and have him drive to Tulsa to unload our vehicle so that we have room for more purchases.


• We've also been known to stay out almost a whole 24 hours. Now, that's what you call marathon shopping.

Don't worry. I won't be doing this.

Do you shop on Black Friday? If so, what's your confession?

Friday Confessions and my new office decor ;)

• Should I confess now or later that I've been falling asleep to Twilight (the movie) playing on my iPod?
• Along with that I should also confess that I've been listening to Twilight (the movie) on my way to work...not watching...ok, watching, but just every brief once in a while when I know Edward graces the screen....oooo, and that one scene at the end where Jacob shows up at the prom. Love that scene.
• I sent Melissa a care package b/c her kiddos have been sick with the Swine Flu. (that wasn't the confession) I took some tissue paper with me just in case I needed it as a filler in the box. After purchasing my care package items, I dumped them all in the Fed-Ex box. In my haste to get the package into the Fed-Ex drop before the deadline, I left the said tissue paper all folded up nice and neatly in the bottom of the box. I'm sure Melissa was like "thanks, Jen...tissue paper, just what we needed...are we supposed to blow our nose with this?"
• I let the ATM eat my debit card! Yep, I walked off and left my card in a machine and it ate it! I almost forgot how to write a check. I've been in awkward situations a few times already because of it. Like last night, I ran by the convenience store (who does NOT take checks) to purchase a bottle of water and some Mountain Dew for Michael. I realized I did not have a debit card or cash and had to make my purchase with quarters. (Man, those quarters have really saved me lately!) Mr. Habeeb (ok, I don't really know his name, but that seems fitting) seemed really appreciative. He said "o, thank you...we been short on change." Glad I could help, Mr. Habeeb. Glad I could help.
• I've made a few changes to my decor in my office...

Is it too...how do I put this...over the top? I really need your professional opinion...or maybe I should just see a professional...therapist, that is.

Hope everyone has a fabulous Friday!

Friday Confessions

• Isaiah had beef jerky and pickles for breakfast one morning...don't ask.


• In church last Sunday, the thought of hair extensions came to mind and although Pastor was giving a wonderful message, my mind kept drifting to hair extensions...I don't have hair extensions and I honestly don't know anyone (personally) that does...so I have no idea why I couldn't get the topic out of my brain. I'm pretty sure that's not what God was wanting me to get from the sermon.


• I am SO ready for this election to be over.


• While on politics, I just want it to be known that I don't agree with the bailout.


• I've let Isaiah stay up until 10:30 every night because I want to spend a little extra time with him. Getting home late from work sucks!


• I feel guilty when I leave work because there is so much to be done.


• I also feel guilty when I'm not at home...something's gotta give.


• Oh, now I guess I should confess that I said the word 'sucks'...my mom hates that word.


• I watched Dirty Sexy Money the other night...and I liked it...this comes after me stating (and I quote) "that show is so trashy and superficial." I guess I like trashy and superficial.


• I live vicariously through Addison from Private Practice (previously of Grey's Anatomy)...I mean come on, who wouldn't...she's a gorgeous red-head, a doctor, and she lives on the beach...oh, and not to mention the hot SWAT guy that she went on a date with! HOTT!

Friday Confessions

I'll just feel better going into the weekend, if I can get a few things off my chest. When I was little, I always told on myself...so this just comes naturally.

1. I've had 3 pieces of cake this week. It was my birthday, what can I say?
2. I let Isaiah stay up until 12:30 last night, because I was watching What Happens in Vegas (great movie, btw, if you haven't seen it already)
3. My house is the pits! I totally need to go on a cleaning spree...hopefully the urge hits me soon.
4. I haven't done laundry since...are you ready for this....MONDAY...yeah, I know.
5. I think I totalled it up correctly and I have been on blogger, cafemom, or myspace a total of 7 hours this week...while at work...not on my lunch hour...shhhh.
6. I was late to work twice this week, because I watched DVR'd versions of my fav shows in the morning before work.
7. I was just balancing my check book using on-line banking...and I've spent a total of 137.54 on nothing but "craft supplies"...glad I have birthday money.
8. I've only exercised once this week...unless typing is now considered exercise.
9. I've been to Starbucks 6 times since Monday...and today just getting started
10. I can't think of a #10, but if it hits me later in the day, I'll be sure to come on here and document it...I just couldn't live with the list at #9...maybe that should be my 10th...I'm a little OCD about weird things...

Are we still friends?